Warning: Major spoilers for the new Halloween lie ahead.

The investigative journalists who basically just have a podcast

You shouldn't taunt a notorious serial killer—even if it's for your podcast.

The tiny dancer and his dad who just want quality bonding time

The babysitter and her hilarious favorite

The babysitter's boyfriend (who looks a lot like Cole Sprouse?)

The most considerate buddy cops of all time

Allyson's yo-yo-loving dad, Ray

No amount of peanut butter on your penis can save you from certain death.

Should you join Halloween's victims?